It has been a week since I walked down the aisles at Universal, and I have to
say my perspective is a little different. I would like to point out that the way
TNA shoots its tapings in a two hour format helps you feel like you can compare
their matches to the other live shows of different brands. I can’t say that it
was my favourite event to ever go to, because I have been to many that have been
better as far as my excitement level. I think it was probably the best wrestling
show I have been to, but it lacks the fun I had with WCW in its heyday. TNA lacks
the characters that Vince and Bischoff had at their disposal now and back in the
glory days. Hell, I was entertained by Buff Bagwell once when he blew a spot and
pulled out the Danny Glover line, "I am too old for this shit," as he
walked by us. I am not here to say that TNA has a chance to be king, because it
has barely pricked the old warrior, but it is right now a better product than
Raw.
I have to agree with Bischoff once again, there is a fundamental problem out
there with people wanting to be heels and booed. I am not talking about your
run of the mill Hogan monster that was created for Cena. I am talking about
your lying, cheating, whining tough heel that you love to hate. Where is he?
I ask people to tell me someone that is such a heel besides Finley and Regal.
Everyone wants to be the cool heel, but the best heel in TNA is a manager! Yet
the sinister minister is a great one that needed more props back in his days
in WCW when managing Mortis and Wrath. It is like having Bobby Heenan without
all the stars that were with him. Rude and Henning, RIP, you were truly golden
and sometimes lost in this up and coming group of wrestling fans. I can write
20 pages on Mr. Perfect, but that is for another Darlin’ rant.
I can honestly say after watching Vince McMahon being the biggest heel on his
show once again Monday, that I threw back a pint and cursed at the clovers that
only bring a wrestling curse to my Irish Heart. I know about getting attention
for your product, but make sure your product isn’t below an amoeba on the evolutionary
chain before you go after that pub. This product will be rejected by anyone
that is not already a viewer and painfully listens to the fingers on the chalkboard
each week. I am beginning to believe the only people that watch it are people
that do these articles like me. How else can you subject yourself to a shit
bath! I AM A VINCE WHORE AND SHOULD WEAR A SHIRT THAT SAYS IT CAUSE HE PIMPS
A LITTLE BIT OF MY SOUL OUT EACH WEEK, AND CRUSHES MY ETERNAL LOVE FOR WRESTLING.
I guess back to TNA and how I feel about them. They need to get better in production,
more slick, and do a better job marketing their product. I think that takes
time, but it also takes balls. I think Russo is a good fit for them right now
in the fact that he has balls. I don’t agree with everything he does but he
is out on the limb trying crap that Andy Kaufman would be perplexed by if he
wasn’t stuck in his Tony Clifton outfit.
Did Russo blow a PPV match with A.J. vs. Angle? No, because I don’t think in
his mind he sees A.J. in that status yet. When A.J.’s heel turn starts developing
more, I believe he will see him in that manner, but until then he is a upper
mid-carder on the show. I am sorry X-men, but the guy needs a personality transplant
more than Ben Affleck. The Joe/Angle thing has been disappointing to me, but
it is because I expect so much from both men. I like most fans also need to
respect that the feud is in its infancy, and these guys will get used to each
other and put on the payoff match down the road.
Sting and Abyss – well the father thing is crazy to me, but you know I like
my Dad. I have never had a reason to shoot him three times except the year everyone
got a Star Wars AT-AT for Christmas and mine was left at the Toys R’ Us line
with Geoffrey the Giraffe, laughing at Darlin’ Danny. Yet I forgave him before
I got my 45 caliber, and I guess he is happy with that decision. Do I think
it is hokey? Yes! Does it help cause a cool-ass fireball shot! Yes! SO I am
dancing like a Leprechaun gigging on my golden dab looms.
The rest of the roster is slowly being flushed out and gaining personality.
I will reserve judgment until that is complete. Yet one man does strike my ire
in TNA and that is the Pied Piper of TNA, Eric Young. Wearing the "Don’t
Fire Eric" shirt while he works at the company and his stupid walk makes
me wishfully dream of Adrian Street skipping to the ring and from the help of
woman blinding Eric with hairspray. Adrian Street, you truly were a genius unlike
this imbecile! So, in closing, I will leave with a southern reference. I am
as disappointed in wrestling right now as I was when Cowboy Bob lost his election
to keep doing Krystal’s hamburger commercials. A tip of the hat and a "Oh
Danny Boy" to you, Cowboy Bob!
Darlin’ Danny Dunn