They taped Raw two hours ahead of time and then Saturday Night’s Main Event in that order
Jim Ross/JBL/Michael Cole as announcers
Teased throughout the show they would reveal Vince’s child
Batista & Kane b Great Khali & Fit Finlay when Batista pinned Finlay after a Batista bomb. Match wasn’t bad since Khali was almost never in.
MVP and Evander Holyfield were backstage acting like they were posse members
John Cena b Carlito with the STFU in a quick match, almost a squash. Crowd was more into Cena here than on Raw. Post-match saw Orton, getting a total babyface response, doing a run-in. He gave Cena an RKO on a chair outside the ring
Matt Hardy vs. Holyfield in a boxing match. Michael Buffer was ring announcer. They plugged Holyfield’s next match and put him over, so there must be a business deal here with Vince in some form.
Holyfield destroyed Hardy. In round two, Holyfield turned babyface because he refused to continue to pummel Hardy. MVP got mad at him for not hurting Hardy, so he KO’d MVP
C.M. Punk & Boogeyman b Big Daddy V & John Morrison when Punk pinned Morrison with a small package. Crowd was leaving in droves during this match
Vince & Coachman were out last to find the illegitimate child. First Coachman said Vince had an affair in Kentucky and brought out Eugene. Vince said that was impossible. Then they talked about an affair in New York and brought out Balls Mahoney. They concluded that wasn’t possible because Vince had no balls. Next there was an affair after Wrestlemania II in Los Angeles and brought out Melina. They insinuated that wasn’t possible as Vince has slept with Melina and Melina claimed if she was Vince’s daughter she’d take him for everything. The segment ended with a surprise Steve Austin appearance to a gigantic pop. Austin gave Vince a low blow and Coachman a stunner. He stayed out a long time, they were all singing together and Austin gave both stunners again.