The night opened on a somber note. Elijah Burke came into the ring and addressed the crowd. He stated that last week we were blessed to have Matt Capotelli in the ring and show us all that everyone in the arena is family. He said that we have to take these moments like right now to cherish one another. At that time he brought into the ring the woman and her child. They were both in tears and hugged Elijah. Elijah stated that they were the mother and brother of an OVW fan named Billie who passed away Sunday night. A “Thank You Billie” chant started. They then passed around a bucket to collect money for the family for the funeral expenses.
After a few solemn moments things got under way with 2 dark matches.
First up was the team of The Russians (Ogre and Boris) w/ their female valet (whose name I have been unable to confirm thus far) against The Desperados. The Desperados were two students whom I’ve never been able to catch the names of. One of whom looks like the long lost brother of Christian.
Lots of USA chants directed at The Russians. Boris opened the match posing to stall a bit. After the posing subsided Boris and the Desperado not alluded to in my earlier description smacked each other about. Boris worked him into The Russians’ corner and Ogre comes in. Ogre whips the Desperado into the ropes and the valet grabs the Desperado’s foot. The referee admonishes the valet and Ogre turns this into a near fall on the confused Desperado. The Russians now press their advantage on the Desperado until the hot tag is built for the Christian-esque Desperado. This Desperado briefly cleans house but The Russians get their wits about themselves together. Ogre lays out both Desperados, Boris goes up top, salutes and dives off with a head butt from the top turnbuckle. Ogre then attempts to that Desperado only to have the Christian-eque Desperado roll him for the pin.
Our second dark match saw KC Jaymez defeat Danny Inferno with a superkick. The match actually opened with chants for KC who seems to really be taking off the fans in the arena at long last. The match opens with KC applying a standing hammerlock on Inferno, Inferno works it around into an arm drag, KC breaks it up and they back away. Crowd now chants for Danny. Inferno goes right back to the arm drag, this time really putting heavy torque on KC’s arm, following it up with elbows onto the now prone arm. Inferno hip tosses KC and then covers him for a two count. KC, none too pleased, thumbs Inferno’s eyes. KC then Irish whips Inferno into the turn buckle and Inferno stumbles back out into a stiff lariat. KC decides to wear Inferno down with a headlock but the crowd brings Inferno back to life. Inferno fights out of the headlock, whips KC into the ropes and hits a swinging neckbreaker. Both men rise up and Inferno hits a big body drop and then the Garvin Stomp. KC begs off any further offense in the corner but Inferno pounds KC until the ref steps in to pull Inferno away. While the ref and Inferno discuss the 5 count rule, KC tunes up the band. He lunges forward with a super kick but misses. As Inferno comes up from ducking the first kick he is nailed with a second attempt. KC then covers Inferno for the victory.
Now that the dark matches are done, they take a shot of the kids in the Pizza Chain Who Will Remain Nameless Party Zone to warm up the crowd for going “live”. Dean Hill then tells us that a tournament begins tonight to crown a new OVW Heavyweight Champion. Eight men are in this tournament our first round matches tonight are as follows: Elijah Burke vs Brent The Shooter Albright; The Miz vs Rene Dupree; Johnny Jeter vs Chris Cage; Ken Doane vs CM Punk.
No sooner than Hill has finished running down the card then Albright’s music hits. He comes out still sporting the leather strap from his attack on CM Punk last week. Elijah then enters the ring and grabs a mic. He starts to bring up Cappotelli’s speech from last week and Albright just snaps. Albright lays into Burke with the strap and then begins choking him with it. Officials pour out of the back and break up the two men. The officials try to make Albright leave but Burke tells Albright to bring it on. The bell rings and Elijah pounds Albright into a corner. Albright ducks down and pulls Burke face-first into the top turnbuckle. As Burke staggers backwards Albright locks his arms around Burke’s waist for a German Suplex. Burke breaks the waistlock and hits The Experience. Instead of pinning Albright Elijah heads outside and picks up the leather strap. As Burke approaches Albright the referee yanks the strap from Burke’s hand. Albright now locks the waist of Burke and nails a stiff German Suplex. This garners a two count but Burke’s neck has been weakened. Albright whips Burke into the far corner but misses a splash. Burke turns around and hits a Big Back Body Drop, Burke then arm drags Albright and connects with a short armed lariat. Burke is holding his neck and calls for The Experience. Albright is up but gets behind Burke to nail yet another very stiff suplex. This time Burke cant come back and Albright collects the victory.
We see Osama on the OVW-tron. He says he was in NYC to meet with several big rollers to fund his revolution back home over the weekend. However while he was there he ran into the WWE’s surprise representative for the OVW Tournament. He knows who it is and wants everyone to see him walking down the hall right now! The cameraman turns around to a slamming door. Osama laughs, he knows who it is, but he also knows how to keep a secret.
Maria in next interviewing the Spirit Squad. Maria mentions that is both Jeter and Doane win tonight they will be opponents in the semi-finals next week. Doane then states he is the youngest WWE Superstar ever t 19 years old. He also mentions that he has the most spirit in the room. Jeter lets Doane know that win or lose in his own match he is pulling for Doane. However everyone knows that as Cappotelli’s former tag partner he is the rightful successor to the title. That is why tonight Jeter will win for…THE SPIRIT SQUAD.
Chris Cage makes his way into the ring next. Then “Pump Up The Jams” hits as Jeter comes out to a face pop. Match starts fast with Cage running the ropes and Jeter leapfrogging over him and coming back around with a spinning heel kick that Cage ducks and rolls out of the ring. Jeter suicide dives onto Cage, pounds him and rolls him back into the ring for a 2 count. Cage comes back and slaps Jeter into a corner. Jeter counters with several chops to Cage, then follows up with a moonsault off the 2nd turnbuckle. That gives Jeter another near-fall. Cage quickly back up and sets up Jeter for a snap suplex and his own near-fall. Frustrated at not getting the three count, Cage drags Jeter to the ropes and chokes him on the second rope. Cage then moves Jeter to the corner to pound on him before whipping him across the ring into the ropes and hitting Jeter with a clothesline. Another near-fall for Cage. Snap mare take over for Cage and he takes the boots to Jeter’s head. He then lugs Jeter over to the turnbuckle and starts to thrust Jeter headfirst into the turnbuckle, only to have Jeter reverse it. Jeter mounts an offensive and calls for the superkick. Jeter misses the superkick, Cage catches Jeter with a DDT and gets the pinfall.
Osama is back on the OVW-tron talking to the Highlanders in the back. He asks if they know who the secret WWE rep is and both of The Highlanders just scratch their heads. Osama then asks them for their picks to win the tournament. Robby says Cage will win. Rory then goes into a forlorn sheep about a sheep he left back home five years ago. Rory is interrupted by Shelly in pirate wench regalia banging on the door of Paul Birchill. Paul then answers the door and asks to be left alone as she isnt the type of wench he is looking for. Shelly cant believe it.
Returning to the arena now, we have The Miz facing off with Rene Dupree as our Title Tournament continues. They trade blows to open until an open hand slap sends Dupree outside. Durpee climbs back in only to be knocked back out by a running shoulder block. Mizarian pulls Dupree back in and mounts him in the corner only to be shoved down tot he mat by Dupree. Dupree up to the second rope and hits an elbow. Miz tries to come back but Dupree stops him short. Dupree hits another second rope elbow and goes back up for a third. This time as he comes down Miz is waiting with a boot to the face. Miz then hits a springing elbow and whips Dupree into the corner. As Miz charges in Dupree buts up his boot and staggers Miz. Dupree goes up to the top rope this time only to have Mizarian stumble into the ropes and knock him off. The Miz then hits a Scorpion Death Drop for the win.
Maria is in the back with Aaron the Idol and Beth Phoenix. Maria asks Idol for his pick in the tournament when Shelly barges in. She couldn’t believe that Burchill doesnt want her as his wench after all she has done for him. Such as listen to all his phone messages, check all his emails, sit outside his house, walk his dog while he was away and obsess over his every move 24-7. Idol says that is what he loves most about Shelly. Shelly instructs Maria to tell Paul she will be hunting him. Maria tells Shelly she needs help as Shelly slams the door in her face.
Osama then appears and asks Maria if she knows who the WWE rep is. Osama says he will tell her for a donation to his revolution, or perhaps if they just make love instead. Maria rejects his advances.
Our main event for the evening is Ken Doane vs CM Punk. The entire Spirit Squad comes out and Pumps Up The Jams again for Doane. They even bring out a trampoline for their routine. Trust me the WWE is not showing what these guys can do with this gimmick. Punk wastes little time charging straight at Doane. Punk chops Doane back into the corner and then follows up with a drop kick to the back of Doane’s head. Big Back Body Drop by Punk. He turns around and finds Doane back up, Doane goes for a kick but Punk catches his foot and trips up Doane for a quick cover. He takes Doane’s headband and backs him into the corner to begin choking Doane with the headband. Doane then throttles Punk across the ring into the far corner. Doane backs away and as the ref is talking to Doane the Spirit Squad begins attacking Punk. Doane gets a near fall out of this but Punk comes back with a Suplex followed up by a high knee in the corner. Punk then hooks up Doane for the Welcome To Chicago Mother Fucker and Nick Mitchell jumps on the apron. Punk then gives chase to Nick Nemeth who leads him outside the ring into a trap of Mondo jumping off the trampoline and nailing punk with a hard cross body. Doane rolls Punk back into the ring for a two count fall. Punk tries to come back but is thrown outside again. As the ref’s back is turned the Spirit Squad hits a 4 person H-bomb on Punk. The Squad rolls Punk back into the ring. Doane goes for a suplex only to have Punk counter with a small package. Punk gets a 2 count as Mondo throws his shirt into the ring for Doane to choke Punk with. Doane then ditches the shirt and chokes Punk with his wrist tape. Doane then applies a headlock and wears down Punk in the middle of the ring. The ref checks Punk’s hand, it falls twice but not the third time. Punk powers back up and whips Doane into the ropes. As Doane comes back Punk gives him a boot to the face and then a springing elbow off the top the top rope. The men stagger then trade blows, Punk this time nails the Welcome To Chicago Motherf*****, and gets a near-fall. Punk hits the Manchurian Chops and then the Anaconda Vice. Doane is about to tap when the Squad distracts the ref. Albright runs into the ring at this point only to get a kick to the head by Punk for his efforts. Punk then low blows Doane and rolls him up for the pin.
Post match Albright and the Spirit Squad lay into Punk. The officials cant stop it so the locker room empties to pull the two men apart. That’s when the WWE rep arrived. It was Mr Kennedy. He asks where the professionalism is in all of this after what Cappotelli showed us last week. He says that Matt wouldn’t have let this end in a pull apart, no he would’ve said, “LET THEM FIGHT!” So our broadcast ends with the entire OVW roster duking it out with Kennedy laughing maniacally at ringside.